Battle between the Hot Dog and the Dougnut continues.
January 17th 2007 17:19
Here's a little tip boys. If your woman says "Hey you know later, I'd like to have some sex" DON'T go and you know, play video games all night, and then putz around with the turtle tank at midnight. You're just asking for trouble. Plus, you're wasting a perfect opportunity to hello, HAVE SEX!! There are guys in China who are starving for snatch and MY husband just throws it away willy nilly. I've just made it to accesible to him. I think I need to start withholding.
I mean, how much more up front to I have to be? I said "TONIGHT I WANT TO HAVE SEX" What else more do I have to do? I know some guys are probably thinking I should have blown him or something, to get his mind of of the game, but come on! I shouldn't have to beg my man should I? Just knowing I wanted to should have been enough to want to do it right?
In his defense, he probably got caught up in Nerdvana and lost track of time. That's cool. Yes, by the time he was done farting around with the turtle tank, I WAS chatting with a friend while we bothlusted over watched Louis C.K. and commented about his foul (albeit hilarious) mouth and hideous pants. But at that time, it was creeping up on 1 am and I was only chatting becuase I WASNT GETTING THE SEXYTIME!
So, then of course, this opens up the whole "What a jerk ass bastard" box I have tucked away in my little black heart. Wy doesn't he ever wash dishes? Why can't he put his plate in the sink? Why didn't he COME FUCK ME WHEN I TOLD HIM THAT'S WHAT I WANTED!
:
igh::
When I brought it up last night at like 2am he rolls over and says "So, do you still want to?" Um hell no? Is that a good answer? I'm sure he would have been satisfied with that, but he got the much longer version. I could feel him seething there. Like, he had something to say, but just wanted to fucking sleep damn it, so he'll just keep it to himself.
It all came to fruition though this morning. I went to the Dr and was a little bummed by the news I got. (I have to take diabetic insulin pills to get my sugar under control and lose about a trillion lbls) I for some reason got it in my head that Tony would do something for me, like waqsh dishes, fold clothes. Something. Of course he didn't. Of course I said something. Of course last night was brought up again.
Here is the part that makes my black heart swell!! Here is the most delicious part. In an attempt to prove to me that I was so wrong about the time he came upstairs, (He claims he was upstairs by 11 and that he was ready to go, but I was chatting) he huffs "Fine! I'll show you I'm right!! I'll go see when I logged onto the game last" He scurries downstairs, with a hint of evil glee that screams "I GOTCHA NOW BITCH!"
But, he never comes upstairs. After about ten minutes, I hear a scuffle on the steps. I hear slow moseying in the kitchen. He walks into the living room, and flops down. I let him sit in his apparant despair for a few moments, and ask oh so casually "So, uh what time did you get off the comptuer last night?" He mumbles a number. I said "What?" and he snaps "11:30 ok?" Which means he got off probably around 11:45 after he checked email one last time etc, went to smoke, took the garbage out, then fiddled with the turtle tank, which would out him right about the correct timeframe I had him at.
The bitch was right.
Ha!
When will he learn? When will he learn that women are equipped with a natural time clock in their bodies. We know down to the MINUTE what you were doing. Ask us any date, and we spew that shit out Rainman counting toothpicks. We can't remember to check the oil, but we know what you were doing on Sept. 29th 1998 at 4:52 pm. Kinda the way a guy knows Boba Fett's birthday, yet can't remember to change his underwear.
I mean, how much more up front to I have to be? I said "TONIGHT I WANT TO HAVE SEX" What else more do I have to do? I know some guys are probably thinking I should have blown him or something, to get his mind of of the game, but come on! I shouldn't have to beg my man should I? Just knowing I wanted to should have been enough to want to do it right?
In his defense, he probably got caught up in Nerdvana and lost track of time. That's cool. Yes, by the time he was done farting around with the turtle tank, I WAS chatting with a friend while we both
So, then of course, this opens up the whole "What a jerk ass bastard" box I have tucked away in my little black heart. Wy doesn't he ever wash dishes? Why can't he put his plate in the sink? Why didn't he COME FUCK ME WHEN I TOLD HIM THAT'S WHAT I WANTED!
:
igh::When I brought it up last night at like 2am he rolls over and says "So, do you still want to?" Um hell no? Is that a good answer? I'm sure he would have been satisfied with that, but he got the much longer version. I could feel him seething there. Like, he had something to say, but just wanted to fucking sleep damn it, so he'll just keep it to himself.
It all came to fruition though this morning. I went to the Dr and was a little bummed by the news I got. (I have to take diabetic insulin pills to get my sugar under control and lose about a trillion lbls) I for some reason got it in my head that Tony would do something for me, like waqsh dishes, fold clothes. Something. Of course he didn't. Of course I said something. Of course last night was brought up again.
Here is the part that makes my black heart swell!! Here is the most delicious part. In an attempt to prove to me that I was so wrong about the time he came upstairs, (He claims he was upstairs by 11 and that he was ready to go, but I was chatting) he huffs "Fine! I'll show you I'm right!! I'll go see when I logged onto the game last" He scurries downstairs, with a hint of evil glee that screams "I GOTCHA NOW BITCH!"
But, he never comes upstairs. After about ten minutes, I hear a scuffle on the steps. I hear slow moseying in the kitchen. He walks into the living room, and flops down. I let him sit in his apparant despair for a few moments, and ask oh so casually "So, uh what time did you get off the comptuer last night?" He mumbles a number. I said "What?" and he snaps "11:30 ok?" Which means he got off probably around 11:45 after he checked email one last time etc, went to smoke, took the garbage out, then fiddled with the turtle tank, which would out him right about the correct timeframe I had him at.
The bitch was right.
Ha!
When will he learn? When will he learn that women are equipped with a natural time clock in their bodies. We know down to the MINUTE what you were doing. Ask us any date, and we spew that shit out Rainman counting toothpicks. We can't remember to check the oil, but we know what you were doing on Sept. 29th 1998 at 4:52 pm. Kinda the way a guy knows Boba Fett's birthday, yet can't remember to change his underwear.
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